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Dead Serious Advertising Insights.

40 years of advertising experience. Written down so you can stop making the same expensive mistakes.

An illustrated zombie character stands under a spotlight, pulling open a velvet stage curtain with one hand while holding up a hand mirror to its own eye with the other, as though dramatically revealing a hidden secret.
September 25, 2026

Eyelid Surgery Is Your Practice's Best-Kept Secret. Stop Keeping It a Secret.

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Eyelid Surgery Is Your Practice's Best-Kept Secret. Stop Keeping It a Secret.

Blepharoplasty was the most-performed facial procedure in the country last year, yet most practices market it like an afterthought behind boob jobs and BBLs. Here's how to actually advertise it to the local patients who are already searching for it.

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A cartoon zombie mascot works contentedly at a messy desk covered in completed project folders, stapling a finished report, while an old telephone sits unplugged and buried under stacks of paperwork.
September 23, 2026

Your Client Doesn't Need You On Speed Dial. They Need You To Do The Job.

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Your Client Doesn't Need You On Speed Dial. They Need You To Do The Job.

Every agency that dies a slow death dies the same way: too many "quick calls," not enough finished work. Here's how to fix the client relationship that's eating your business alive.

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Illustration of a zombie electrician standing next to an open circuit breaker panel, holding up two printed before-and-after photos of the panel while tools sit on the ground nearby.
September 21, 2026

Your Panel Upgrade Photos Are Worth More Than Your Ad Budget

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Your Panel Upgrade Photos Are Worth More Than Your Ad Budget

Your best marketing asset is already sitting in your phone's camera roll. Here's how to turn before/after project photos into the proof that actually books jobs.

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A zombie mascot cranks a hand-operated paper sorter to clear a pile of documents at a cluttered desk, with a coffee mug and organized index cards nearby.
September 18, 2026

AI Won't Write Your Ads. It'll Do the Grunt Work So You Can.

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AI Won't Write Your Ads. It'll Do the Grunt Work So You Can.

Everyone's yelling about AI "revolutionizing" marketing while doing none of it themselves. Here's what actually using AI in a marketing workflow looks like, no hype, no robot takeover.

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An illustrated zombie mascot gestures between two large framed pictures on easels—one bathed in warm light, the other wrapped in heavy chains and a padlock—while holding a measuring tape and a clipboard.
September 16, 2026

Your Liposuction Gallery Is Either Booking Consults or Building a Compliance Case File

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Your Liposuction Gallery Is Either Booking Consults or Building a Compliance Case File

Liposuction is the most in-demand cosmetic procedure in the country, but most practices are showing it off wrong. Here's how to build a before/after gallery that converts patients without inviting a board complaint.

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A zombie mascot triumphantly holds up a large glowing headline banner above a messy desk of crumpled paper drafts and a nearly-empty hourglass, illustrating the idea that the headline deserves attention first, not last.
September 14, 2026

Your Headline Is Doing 80% of the Work. Stop Writing It Last.

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Your Headline Is Doing 80% of the Work. Stop Writing It Last.

Most people write the headline in ten seconds after finishing the ad. That's backwards, and it's why most ads die on arrival. Here's how to actually build one that earns the read.

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A cartoon zombie mascot kneels on a rooftop next to an AC unit, holding up a giant map-pin marker and inspecting it curiously, with a ladder and toolboxes nearby and a rival service van visible in a neighboring driveway.
September 11, 2026

Why Your HVAC Company Isn't Showing Up on Google (And It's Not Your Website)

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Why Your HVAC Company Isn't Showing Up on Google (And It's Not Your Website)

Your website looks fine. Your reviews are decent. So why does the HVAC company down the street rank above you every summer? It's probably your Google Business Profile, not your site.

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An illustrated zombie mascot proudly presents a loaf of bread and a dish of butter behind a counter, standing over a tabletop city map covered in push-pin markers.
September 9, 2026

Breast Augmentation Is Your Practice's Bread and Butter. Your Local Ads Better Act Like It.

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Breast Augmentation Is Your Practice's Bread and Butter. Your Local Ads Better Act Like It.

306,196 breast augmentations happened in 2024. That's your busiest procedure, and it deserves more than a stock photo and a "book now" button. Here's how to actually target the patients researching this in your area.

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits calmly at a desk with a rotary phone pushed aside, extending a confident handshake toward the viewer beside a tidy stack of folders and a small potted plant.
September 7, 2026

Your Client Doesn't Need a Weekly Call. They Need to Trust You.

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Your Client Doesn't Need a Weekly Call. They Need to Trust You.

Agencies burn hours babysitting clients who don't trust them yet, and call it "relationship management." Here's how to build actual trust so you can get back to doing the work.

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A cartoon zombie mascot kneels on a rooftop taking an instant photo of a shiny new HVAC unit, with a rusted old unit removed and set aside beside it.
September 4, 2026

Your HVAC Crew Does Museum-Quality Work. Your Website Shows Zero Proof.

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Your HVAC Crew Does Museum-Quality Work. Your Website Shows Zero Proof.

You ripped out a 20-year-old rooftop unit and made it look like a Home Depot showroom. Nobody knows because you didn't take a picture. Let's fix that.

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Illustration of a zombie mascot at a paper-covered desk, sorting research notes and holding a highlighter and mug amid crumpled drafts, looking productive and in charge.
September 2, 2026

Your AI Isn't a Copywriter. Here's What It's Actually Good For.

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Your AI Isn't a Copywriter. Here's What It's Actually Good For.

Everyone's telling you AI will replace your marketing team. It won't. But used right, it'll make your actual team about ten times faster. Here's the difference.

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Illustration of a zombie mascot hanging a neat row of framed before-and-after style graphics on a clinic lobby wall, using a small level to line them up perfectly.
August 31, 2026

Your Breast Lift Before/After Gallery Is Either Building Trust Or Killing It

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Your Breast Lift Before/After Gallery Is Either Building Trust Or Killing It

Breast lift was the 4th most-performed cosmetic surgery in the country last year. If your gallery still looks like a legal liability instead of a sales tool, you're losing patients to the practice down the street who figured this out.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands on a heap of crumpled paper, holding up a large blank scroll and pointing to its top line with a quill, illustrating the importance of a strong headline.
August 28, 2026

Your Headline Is Doing 80% Of The Work. Stop Writing It Last.

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Your Headline Is Doing 80% Of The Work. Stop Writing It Last.

Most people write a headline the way they write a subject line: fast, tired, and last. That's why most ads never get read past the first line. Here's how to actually build one.

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Illustration of a zombie plumber kneeling in a flooded basement next to a spraying burst pipe, wrench in hand, triumphantly holding up a giant glowing map pin marker into the air.
August 26, 2026

Your Plumbing Business Is Invisible on Google. Here's How to Fix That This Week

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Your Plumbing Business Is Invisible on Google. Here's How to Fix That This Week

A burst pipe doesn't wait for a callback. If your Google Business Profile isn't dialed in, the plumber who shows up first in the search results gets the job, not you.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands victoriously on a large rolled-out city map, holding a big magnifying glass and looking toward a distant skyline, with its own tall location pin glowing above several smaller toppled pins and crumpled flyers scattered around its feet.
August 24, 2026

Liposuction Is the #1 Cosmetic Procedure in America. Is It #1 in Your Local Search Results?

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Liposuction Is the #1 Cosmetic Procedure in America. Is It #1 in Your Local Search Results?

Liposuction is the most-performed cosmetic surgery in the country and the most-searched term on RealSelf. If your practice isn't showing up when your city types "lipo near me," someone else's practice is cashing that check.

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A zombie mascot celebrates victoriously on a small podium amid confetti and a trophy, unaware that a client figure is walking out the door behind them, suitcase in hand, as a handshake-shaped balloon slowly deflates nearby.
August 21, 2026

Why Your Best Clients Fire You Right After You Do Great Work

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Why Your Best Clients Fire You Right After You Do Great Work

Great campaign results don't guarantee a client sticks around. Here's why the win itself is often the moment agencies lose the relationship, and what to do about it.

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A cartoon zombie plumber stands at the open doors of his work van, proudly holding up a rusty old water heater beside a pile of corroded pipes spilling from a toolbox.
August 19, 2026

Your Plumbing Truck Is Full of Proof. Your Website Has None of It.

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Your Plumbing Truck Is Full of Proof. Your Website Has None of It.

You rip out a nightmare of galvanized pipe and rusted water heaters every single week. If nobody sees it, you're leaving the easiest sale in home services sitting on the truck.

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A zombie mascot sits at a messy desk, sorting stacked paper drafts into two trays and writing by hand with a pencil, with a small gear-shaped paperweight and a coffee mug nearby.
August 17, 2026

AI Won't Write Your Ads For You. Here's What It Actually Does.

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AI Won't Write Your Ads For You. Here's What It Actually Does.

Everyone's telling you AI will replace your marketing team. It won't. Here's the boring, useful truth about where AI actually saves you time in a real marketing workflow.

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A zombie mascot acts as a velvet-rope bouncer, holding back a line of eager readers while discarded fancy scrolls lie on the ground and a plain, welcoming doorway glows behind it.
August 14, 2026

Your Headline Isn't Clever. It's a Bouncer, and It's Turning People Away.

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Your Headline Isn't Clever. It's a Bouncer, and It's Turning People Away.

Most headlines are auditioning for a poetry slam when their only job is to stop the scroll. Here's the framework that actually gets the second sentence read.

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A zombie wearing a headset, stunned as a tiny chattering zombie-figurine assistant speaks for his business.
July 16, 2026

Nobody's Googling You Anymore. They're Asking a Robot What You're Like.

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Nobody's Googling You Anymore. They're Asking a Robot What You're Like.

A new local SEO checklist wants you to audit what AI says about your business, and the scarier problem is that most owners have never even looked.

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A zombie shop owner recoiling at his counter, swarmed by tiny toy ad-robots with megaphones, while an untouched bell and wilted plant sit nearby -- ads everywhere, nobody actually walking in.
July 15, 2026

Google Built a Toll Booth Inside AI Mode. Stop Paying the Toll Expecting a Parade.

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Google Built a Toll Booth Inside AI Mode. Stop Paying the Toll Expecting a Parade.

A new study says almost a third of searches now show ads inside Google's AI Mode, and the one thing everybody assumed those ads would buy you (a citation, an organic boost, a little AI halo) mostly i…

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A zombie entrepreneur bound by rope, surrounded by tiny figures holding up blank approval signs, breaking free to move forward on his own.
September 18, 2024

Breaking Free from the Reassurance Trap

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Breaking Free from the Reassurance Trap

You're on the brink of launching a revolutionary project.

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A zombie business owner unlocking a large padlock at the center of a warm circle of people gathered close together, celebrating as it clicks open.
September 8, 2024

Unlocking the Potential of Community: A Step-by-Step Guide to Boost Your Business

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Unlocking the Potential of Community: A Step-by-Step Guide to Boost Your Business

In the ever-evolving world of marketing, there's a trend that's more than just a buzzword: community. What started as the #community hashtag on social media has now become a powerful tool that's re...

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A cartoon zombie mascot swings a giant mallet, striking a large dent into an oversized corporate shield on the ground in front of a backdrop of tall, generic skyscrapers.
September 6, 2024

Dent the Universe: How Your Small Agency Can Crush the Big Guys

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Dent the Universe: How Your Small Agency Can Crush the Big Guys

Hey, you. Yeah, you - the small agency owner who's been watching the big shops feast on prime clients while you fight for scraps. It's time to flip the script. There's a revolution happening, and i...

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A cartoon zombie stands on a crumbling platform surrounded by signposts pointing in different directions and torn maps scattered at its feet, looking overwhelmed by the many diverging paths ahead.
September 4, 2024

Search Shakeup: How to Dominate in the AI-Powered Discovery Era

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Search Shakeup: How to Dominate in the AI-Powered Discovery Era

Welcome to the Fragmentation Station

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A zombie tailor comparing two jacket material swatches, shiny vinyl and matte faux leather, deciding which fits better.
August 30, 2024

The Art of Rebranding: From Vinyl to Vegan Leather - How Small Businesses Can Master the Name Game

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The Art of Rebranding: From Vinyl to Vegan Leather - How Small Businesses Can Master the Name Game

The Snapchat Filter of the Business World

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands on a desk with arms raised triumphantly, surrounded by falling confetti and quirky props like a rubber chicken and a disco ball, in front of a corkboard covered in colorful, mismatched marketing sketches.
August 28, 2024

🧠 Embrace the Weird: How Small Businesses Can Supercharge Their Marketing 🧟‍♂️

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🧠 Embrace the Weird: How Small Businesses Can Supercharge Their Marketing 🧟‍♂️

Listen up, you marketing maniacs! While you've been busy trying to crack the code of the next viral TikTok dance, some of the most successful brands out there have been schooling you in the art of ...

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An illustrated zombie mascot bursts joyfully through a decorated market stall archway hung with lanterns and colorful textiles, surrounded by exploding confetti and toppled crates of pottery and spice jars on a cobblestone square.
August 26, 2024

Cultural Chaos: Unleash Your Heritage and Watch Your Small Biz Explode! 💥🚀

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Cultural Chaos: Unleash Your Heritage and Watch Your Small Biz Explode! 💥🚀

HOLY CULTURAL SMACKDOWN, BATMAN! 💥

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie standing beside a muddy backyard pond, gesturing enthusiastically toward it while holding a clipboard, with a shovel, wheelbarrow, and a small crooked sale flag nearby.
July 4, 2024

How To Sell A Hole In The Ground... With Water in It

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How To Sell A Hole In The Ground... With Water in It

I sat in the conference room with no idea who the client was, what they did, or why it was necessary to pull me in on a first meeting with them.

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Illustration of a zombie character at a cluttered drafting table, joyfully tossing storyboard pages into the air next to an old typewriter and a stopwatch.
June 15, 2023

How I Use AI To Speed Up Creative

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How I Use AI To Speed Up Creative

Holy crap! Where was AI 40 years ago when I started in the advertising industry? Imagine the speed of creation if tools like the ones we have today were available back then. Fast forward to 2063; I...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot pushing an empty picture frame to the side while standing confidently among scattered storyboard sketches, torn mood-board clippings, and paintbrushes on the floor, gesturing toward a blank easel.
June 1, 2023

I Don't Need To See Your Product In Ad Ad

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I Don't Need To See Your Product In Ad Ad

Ah, the age-old myth in advertising: "Show the product and they will come." Sorry to burst your bubble, but just because you have a crystal clear image of your product, it doesn't mean you've hit t...

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A cartoon zombie stands casually amid everyday clutter like laundry and a mop bucket, holding a sandwich and a plain cardboard sign, while a line of identical shiny mannequins in sunglasses poses stiffly nearby.
April 19, 2023

Over The Influence: Why We Need More Regular People in Ads

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Over The Influence: Why We Need More Regular People in Ads

I'm so over it. The influencer world, that is. It's like they're all trying to be the same person. I mean, seriously, have you ever scrolled through your feed and thought, "Wow, that's the most ori...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot sitting on a large pile of crumpled paper, holding a glowing quill in one hand and a typewriter key in the other, with sparks of light connecting the two objects.
April 10, 2023

How AI Copywriting Is Revolutionizing My Industry (With a Little Help from My Broken Brain)

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How AI Copywriting Is Revolutionizing My Industry (With a Little Help from My Broken Brain)

As a copywriter with a brain that's a little... different, I've always been fascinated by the power of words to move people and drive business results. And in recent months, I've seen a major shift...

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A zombie mascot stands in a cluttered home office with a lightbulb glowing overhead, snapping its fingers in a moment of sudden realization amid scattered notebooks and coffee cups.
February 1, 2023

The Moment It CLiCK'd

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The Moment It CLiCK'd

I never intended to start a consulting business. Like Ad Zombies, it was an unintentional development.

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A zombie mascot sits confidently at a desk covered in papers, holding a quill aloft while resting a hand on a stack of typewritten pages, evoking a sense of calm creative mastery.
January 11, 2023

Copywriting In The AI Age: Don't Fear Technology, Leverage It

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Copywriting In The AI Age: Don't Fear Technology, Leverage It

When it comes to AI, it's like that one friend who always seems to know the answers to everything — they blurt out every Jeopardy question before you. Oh, wait… that's me. Sorry. AI is not out to s...

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A zombie mascot kneels outside a small shop, planting a sapling in cracked pavement that's sprouting new greenery, with a watering can, crates, and a fresh paint can nearby as sunrise light suggests renewal and growth.
January 10, 2023

2023: The Year Your Small Business Can Thrive

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2023: The Year Your Small Business Can Thrive

As a small business owner, 2023 presents both challenges and opportunities. With the economy facing uncertainty, it's easy to fall into the trap of cutting costs and going into defense mode. But th...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot cheerfully striding into a sunny home office, tossing a crumpled calendar page into a wastebasket near a desk with a plant and a mug.
January 9, 2023

I Used To Hate Mondays

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I Used To Hate Mondays

As someone who used to work as a corporate creative director, I can certainly relate to the feeling of dreading, loathing, and hating Mondays. It was the day that I had to get through to start coun...

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits at a desk, shining a desk lamp on one favorite branding mockup while pushing aside a messy pile of other client project papers.
January 6, 2023

You Shouldn't Have A Favorite Kid, But...

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You Shouldn't Have A Favorite Kid, But...

Hey parents of multiple kids, dogs, cats… even though we know we're not SUPPOSED to have a favorite, we do.

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Illustration of a zombie mascot kneeling among tall stacks of books, holding an open book out toward an empty chair as if trying to explain something to someone who isn't there.
January 5, 2023

Sometimes I Take Knowledge For Granted

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Sometimes I Take Knowledge For Granted

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and found yourself saying something like, "How could you not know that?" or "That's so basic, everyone knows that!" It's easy to take our own knowledge...

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A cartoon zombie mascot clears junk food and cluttered paperwork off a counter into a trash bin, leaving behind a single apple, neat folders, and a small barbell as symbols of a leaner, healthier business approach.
January 4, 2023

The Only Diet Your Business Needs

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The Only Diet Your Business Needs

Congrats! If you're reading this, you've made it a few days into 2023. Though we are early in the new year, many of us entrepreneurs are in business decision-making mode already. OK, truth be told,...

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A cartoon zombie mascot lifts a small dumbbell in a modest home gym, standing on a crumpled resolutions list next to a wall calendar marked with daily checkmarks.
January 2, 2023

Habit Muscles Over Resolutions

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Habit Muscles Over Resolutions

2023 arrived with the usual fanfare, partying, and resolutions… those dreaded resolutions.

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A zombie mascot sits wistfully on an empty stadium bench holding a foam finger, surrounded by drifting confetti and a foggy, dreamlike view of an old, crooked goalpost.
January 1, 2023

Bowl Games Gone Wild (But Should They?)

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Bowl Games Gone Wild (But Should They?)

Remember life years ago, you know, we refer to it as back in the day? (Enter dream sequence music in your head).

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits nervously on a paper-lined exam table, clutching folded medical gowns while eyeing a tray of medical instruments beside it, under a bright exam lamp with a privacy screen in the background.
December 13, 2022

Let Me Get This Right… You Want To Put WHAT, WHERE?

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Let Me Get This Right… You Want To Put WHAT, WHERE?

I used to be terrified of having any kind of medical procedure done, especially ones involving the insertion of instruments into sensitive areas of my body. The thought of someone shoving a tube up...

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands triumphantly on a cracked pedestal in a ruined plaza, holding up a bright new flag while toppled old storefront statues and scattered coins lie in the rubble around it.
December 1, 2022

How To Be A Relevant Brand After The Coming Apocalyptic Recession

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How To Be A Relevant Brand After The Coming Apocalyptic Recession

Dear Advertiser,

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A zombie mascot in a workshop assembles an old ladder, cracked flowerpot, and bicycle wheel into a new inventive sculpture, surrounded by blueprints and a glue gun.
September 1, 2022

Innovation Doesn't Always Mean Starting From Zero

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Innovation Doesn't Always Mean Starting From Zero

Ever sit in a room and try to come up with new ideas?

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Illustration of a zombie proudly holding a large envelope overflowing with gold coins beside a classic street mailbox.
August 26, 2022

I Made Warren Buffett 40-Million Dollars With A Single Email; I Can Make You Money Too.

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I Made Warren Buffett 40-Million Dollars With A Single Email; I Can Make You Money Too.

There's nothing worse than getting a cold email, right? Agreed, if the email is shit, useless, feel spammy, or has zero value. But, if it delivers something… It's AMAZEBALLS! 🤩

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A cartoon zombie sprawled across a bed hugs a pile of pillows and punches one into shape while searching for the perfect comfortable spot, with rumpled blankets on the floor and a lamp glowing softly nearby.
August 1, 2022

Pillow Talk

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Pillow Talk

When my head hits the pillow at the end of a long day, nothing is more frustrating for me than finding that sweet spot: the pillow area where my head sinks in effortlessly and my neck is cradled in...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot standing in a blooming summer garden, catching a giant snowflake in its hands, with a wilting ice cream cone, a thermometer, coins, and a ledger nearby.
July 16, 2022

Is Winter Coming?

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Is Winter Coming?

The First Snowflake Of Summer Has Fallen

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Illustration of a zombie at a wooden desk holding a brass balance scale that weighs a stack of typed pages against a pile of mechanical gears, with a vintage typewriter and desk lamp nearby.
June 8, 2022

Is AI Better Than A Human Copywriter?

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Is AI Better Than A Human Copywriter?

As the owner of the world's premier copywriting service, Ad Zombies, I've played around with AI over the last few years. When you read the online comments and testimonials, it appears AI copywritin...

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits atop a pile of old binders and rolled posters, nostalgically holding a cracked antique megaphone to its ear as old paper charts float through the air around it.
April 27, 2022

We've Forgotten How To Market

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We've Forgotten How To Market

Remember the good old days? You'd fire up an ad campaign on your preferred platform and soon you'd be tracking views, sequencing ads, and moving people into your sales pipeline.

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Illustration of a zombie mascot leaning back triumphantly at a desk, raising a wine glass in a toast surrounded by scrolls, notebooks, and a quill, with crumpled paper on the floor.
February 16, 2022

3 FREE Tools That Make Writing WAY Easier

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3 FREE Tools That Make Writing WAY Easier

Let's face it—writing is hard. Sometimes even for professional copywriters like us! You know what makes it easier? Wine.🍷

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands dramatically atop a pile of large books, holding a quill and a scroll in a theatrical pose, surrounded by crumpled paper and a tipped-over inkwell on a wooden desk.
February 9, 2022

To Blog or Not To Blog...

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To Blog or Not To Blog...

There Is No Question

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands behind a diner counter, sliding a milkshake toward the viewer while holding a clipboard with small job-related icons, with generic speech-bubble and heart icons dangling overhead like decorative string lights.
January 19, 2022

What Job Did You Hire That Milkshake For?

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What Job Did You Hire That Milkshake For?

What job do people hire you to do for them?

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands on a snowy rooftop with arms raised triumphantly, releasing a swirl of papers and sketches into the wind under a dusky sky.
January 11, 2022

Dear Creatives... Be Like Elsa In Frozen And "Let It Go"

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Dear Creatives... Be Like Elsa In Frozen And "Let It Go"

Where are all my creatives at?? 🙋

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Illustration of a zombie mascot happily juggling a wreath and a stack of gift boxes amid scattered garland and ornaments in a festive holiday scene.
January 6, 2022

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (Holiday Edition)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (Holiday Edition)

Outfits, decorations, presents, celebrations, oh my! 😱

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands confidently on a heap of discarded posters, proudly hanging up a wildly colorful, splashy advertisement while ignoring crumpled complaint notes bouncing off it.
December 9, 2021

I Like Offending People With My Ads

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I Like Offending People With My Ads

I really don't care what people think of my ads.

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits at a messy desk, dramatically slumped and playing a tiny violin amid crumpled notes, spilled coffee, and discarded ad sketches.
December 1, 2021

Marketers Are Whiny Bitches

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Marketers Are Whiny Bitches

Yes, I said it. Marketers are a bunch of whiny bitches.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands at an easel in a cluttered workshop, aggressively marking up a large crumpled ad poster with a red pen while torn draft pages and crumpled paper balls litter the floor.
November 17, 2021

Your Ad Sucks! 7 Reasons Your Ad Copy Is Not Performing (& Exactly How To Fix It!)

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Your Ad Sucks! 7 Reasons Your Ad Copy Is Not Performing (& Exactly How To Fix It!)

Sorry, we just came right out and said it.

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Illustration of a zombie sitting on a pier at dusk beside a worn suitcase, watching a loose calendar page blow away over the water.
November 15, 2021

I Lost A Year Of My Life

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I Lost A Year Of My Life

If you don't have bad days or have never had a negative thought, this blog is not for you.

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A zombie mascot behind a market stall piles extra pumpkins and goods into a customer's overflowing basket, surrounded by autumn decorations and warm string lights.
November 10, 2021

How To Get Customers To Buy More In Q4

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How To Get Customers To Buy More In Q4

Cross-Sells, Upsells, and AOV, Oh My!

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie mascot standing on a wooden crate, raising a tin mug in a toast beside a small clamp-light and a folding director's chair, evoking a low-budget movie set.
October 14, 2021

How To Get Champagne Results With a Beer Budget

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How To Get Champagne Results With a Beer Budget

You don't need a Hollywood budget to make a blockbuster ad.

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie arranging flowers and decorative ribbons on a table while proudly holding a large golden number-one trophy ribbon.
September 29, 2021

The #1 MUST-USE Tool Every Small Business Needs

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The #1 MUST-USE Tool Every Small Business Needs

I Like Pretty Things

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A cartoon zombie leans over a limp mannequin figure on a cluttered workshop table, channeling glowing energy through its hands as if reviving the figure with a jolt, surrounded by crumpled paper scraps, an old typewriter ribbon, and a desk lamp.
September 20, 2021

7 Fail-Safe Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Headlines (PLUS, 5 Templates & 37 Examples!)

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7 Fail-Safe Ways to Breathe Life Into Your Headlines (PLUS, 5 Templates & 37 Examples!)

Okay, okay, we KNOW that headlines are super important.

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A cartoon zombie mascot leans back in a chair with one arm draped over its face in exasperation, surrounded by a desk piled with envelopes and a wastebasket overflowing with crumpled letters.
September 10, 2021

I Hate Sending Emails... Hate It!

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I Hate Sending Emails... Hate It!

I hate sending emails… hate it!

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An illustrated zombie mascot perches atop a wobbly tower of ledgers and coin sacks, arms raised as receipts and coins fly through the air around it.
September 3, 2021

We Analyzed $1 Million In Sales. Here's What's Working.

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We Analyzed $1 Million In Sales. Here's What's Working.

Advertising can be such an emotional roller coaster.

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A zombie mascot sits surrounded by crumpled paper and notepads, examining a stack of handwritten ad copy with a magnifying glass, next to a small pet bed filled with toys and a leash.
August 27, 2021

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (July 2021)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (July 2021)

How many pet-related puns can we jam into one ad?? Guess you'll have to scroll to find out if we're fur real.

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A cartoon zombie sits on the floor holding its head in its hands while a chaotic swirl of small thought-bubble icons, some marked with checks and some with X's, hover above it amid scattered papers and crumpled notes.
August 3, 2021

In My Noisy Head

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In My Noisy Head

You know that little voice in the back of your head, the one that tells you to do something or not do something, and this is a good idea or this is a bad idea…? Well, that voice can sometimes be ve...

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A cartoon zombie mascot joyfully slides down a giant looping ribbon of handwritten paper as pages and ink droplets fly behind it, with crumpled drafts and upright pencils scattered on the ground below.
August 1, 2021

Does Your Copy Go Weeeee?

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Does Your Copy Go Weeeee?

We're peeling back the curtains to share an internal resource that our writers use when crafting creative copy.

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A zombie mascot stands next to an oversized trophy shaped like an electric trimmer, holding a clipboard of handwritten notes while torn paper scraps scatter across the floor around a wooden podium.
July 29, 2021

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (June 2021)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (June 2021)

We wrote about a ball trimmer, (…yeah, for men's nuts 🥜) this month, so that's pretty much all you need to know. 😉

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A cartoon zombie mascot plays teacher beside a chalkboard illustrating the evolution of shopping from a town crier's bell to a shopping cart and parcel, standing near a stack of old newspapers and a phone book.
July 23, 2021

E-Comm & Digital Shopping Lingo: Explain It So A Kid Could Understand

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E-Comm & Digital Shopping Lingo: Explain It So A Kid Could Understand

First, there was a town crier, followed by posters, newspapers, and eventually Yellow Pages. Shopping has always been led by awareness and advertising. Today, thanks to companies like Amazon and e-...

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Illustration of a zombie hiding in a pantry, shushing the viewer while sneaking a snack from a plain black box concealed behind other food containers.
July 15, 2021

Oreo Thins Uses Incognito Mode To Stop Kids From Stealing

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Oreo Thins Uses Incognito Mode To Stop Kids From Stealing

OK, that's it. The next time I buy a pack of Oreos I'm hiding them from the kids.

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July 2, 2021

Are You Processing or Procrastinating?

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Are You Processing or Procrastinating?

I'm an inbox-zero girl at heart. I know there are a LOT of interpretations of what that really means, but for me it's this: if it's in my inbox, it needs some kind of action.

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July 2, 2021

Pinterest Bans All Weight Loss Ads, The Only Major Social Platform To Do So

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Pinterest Bans All Weight Loss Ads, The Only Major Social Platform To Do So

And you thought advertising on Facebook was hard…

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A cartoon zombie sits wearily in an armchair, holding a coupon with disdain while surrounded by piles of discarded referral flyers and fake gold coins scattered on the floor.
June 25, 2021

A Very Cynical Opinion of Affiliate Marketing

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A Very Cynical Opinion of Affiliate Marketing

A disclaimer here: you're about to read a bit of a rant. I'm sure that somewhere, out there in the world, there's a company exclusively using affiliate marketing that isn't taking advantage of peop...

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A zombie mascot sits atop a tall stack of giant storybooks, gesturing dramatically as swirling ink shapes rise from an open book and form a castle, a wave, and a heart in the air.
June 18, 2021

5 Proven Ways to Tap into the Power of Storytelling In Your Writing

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5 Proven Ways to Tap into the Power of Storytelling In Your Writing

If you've been here for a while, you know that the S word is our favorite.

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An illustrated zombie perches happily atop a huge leaning stack of paper folders and loose pages, brandishing a pen in each hand as crumpled drafts litter the floor below.
June 11, 2021

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (May 2021)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Copy (May 2021)

We're more than just ad copywriters . . . we write emails, landing pages, scripts, product descriptions, web copy, and more! Our team of undead writers loves to flex their fingers and type the word...

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A zombie mascot squints through a magnifying glass while comparing seven picture frames of different expressions pinned to a large corkboard easel.
June 4, 2021

Why I Tested 7 Thumbnails

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Why I Tested 7 Thumbnails

We've all heard of A/B testing, right? What about A/B/C/D/E/F/G testing?

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands confidently by a podcast microphone stand, holding a folder of papers with gold star stickers scattered at its feet, and a small Union Jack umbrella leaning against a brick wall beside it.
May 28, 2021

Social Media Freelancers & The Art of Landing Clients with The Two Lauras

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Social Media Freelancers & The Art of Landing Clients with The Two Lauras

From all the way across the pond (well, virtually anyway!), The Two Lauras joined our CEO's podcast to share their tips on freelance social media management, how to land 5-star clients, and the rea...

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands at the edge of a large tunnel shaped like a sales funnel made of crates and rope, shrugging with conflicted body language while crumpled flowchart papers litter the ground and a crooked signpost with a glowing bulb stands beside the tunnel.
May 21, 2021

About My Love Hate Relationship With Sales Funnels... [FREE Cheat Sheet!]

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About My Love Hate Relationship With Sales Funnels... [FREE Cheat Sheet!]

Every business needs sales, I am not disputing that fact. What I am disputing is the path many take to get those sales.

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A distinguished zombie stands beside a desk covered with medals, a blueprint, and a family photo, gesturing warmly as if introducing himself, with a globe and open journal nearby suggesting a storied life of duty, business, and family.
May 14, 2021

War Hero, Entrepreneur, Grandfather

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War Hero, Entrepreneur, Grandfather

Allow Me To Introduce You

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A cartoon zombie mascot beams with pride while holding up a wobbly, lopsided tower of blocks, surrounded by the fallen remains of many previous failed attempts.
May 4, 2021

Why Encouraging Failure Is The Way to Go

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Why Encouraging Failure Is The Way to Go

Mom Meaghan: It's totally normal to try and fail a bunch of times before you succeed or get good at something. And sometimes, it just doesn't work.

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An illustrated zombie mascot proudly gestures toward a corkboard covered in varied ad mockups—like a cereal box, flyer, perfume ad, and car banner—while holding a stack of papers, with crumpled drafts and a pen jar on the floor nearby.
April 30, 2021

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Ads (April 2021)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Ads (April 2021)

We kid a LOT, but one thing we don't joke about is that we truly write words for ANYTHING!

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A cartoon zombie mascot snaps a small wooden robot puppet in half over its knee, standing beside a desk with a messy stack of papers and a quill pen ready to write on a blank notepad.
April 27, 2021

Stop Writing Like A Robot

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Stop Writing Like A Robot

Please do us all a favor and stop trying to write for Search Engine Optimization — write for the person you want to reach. Write like people, people!

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits at a messy desk, holding a pen above a partly written page while balancing a torn scrap of paper against a pile of crumpled drafts like a makeshift scale, surrounded by crossed-out pages, a cold coffee cup, and an overflowing wastebasket.
April 16, 2021

No, You Should NOT Outsource Your Copy... Maybe?

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No, You Should NOT Outsource Your Copy... Maybe?

Yep, you read that right.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands on a crate directing an imaginary commercial, waving a sparkling prop wand amid floating confetti, a rubber chicken, a small stepladder, and a bottle with a swirl symbol instead of readable text.
April 8, 2021

How To Make Magic Ads With Daniel Harmon

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How To Make Magic Ads With Daniel Harmon

Poo~Pourri, Squatty Potty, Murphy Ladders, Camp Chef, Purple... the list of advertising successes to come out of the demented minds of Harmon Brothers may lead you to think they have the Midas touc...

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April 5, 2021

Sausage... And A Big, Painful Gap

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Sausage... And A Big, Painful Gap

Here at Ad Zombies HQ, we've often joked about why we don't have any ads that show people writing. After all, copywriting is our bread and butter.

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A zombie sits at a wooden desk surrounded by crumpled paper, hunched over an antique typewriter with one hand raised thoughtfully in the air as if searching for the right word.
March 26, 2021

4 Ways To Write More Engaging Copy

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4 Ways To Write More Engaging Copy

So you want to write better copy . . . ?

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A zombie mascot stands triumphantly on a stone pedestal at a foggy crossroads, holding up a torn map scroll beside a signpost with blank directional arrows.
March 17, 2021

The (Zombie) Hero's Journey

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The (Zombie) Hero's Journey

You've seen it in superhero movies. You may remember it from high school English class. Google it and you'll find about 18 different ways to understand it.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands in a messy home office, juggling several old-fashioned telephones while surrounded by toppling folders, scattered papers, and tangled string lights.
March 3, 2021

Who's On First?

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Who's On First?

Everyone thinks I've got all the stuff in my business dialed in, figured out, and running smoothly at all times. HELL NO! Clearly, you must live in some fantasy world.

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A cartoon zombie sits at a messy desk covered in crumpled paper and notebooks, writing with a fountain pen beside a cold coffee cup and a row of small brain-shaped trophies.
March 3, 2021

Zombie Round-Up: Featured Ads (March 2021)

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Zombie Round-Up: Featured Ads (March 2021)

Copywriting is more than just sitting down, cranking out 500 words, hitting spellcheck, and calling it a day.

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December 20, 2020

Marketing, iOS 14 and Facebook: Are We Really Screwed?

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Marketing, iOS 14 and Facebook: Are We Really Screwed?

Did you get the email? What about the pop-up in Facebook's Business Manager?

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An illustrated zombie mascot eagerly raises one arm while stepping onto a sunlit baseball field, glove in hand, ready to be put into the game.
November 6, 2020

What Do You Value?

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What Do You Value?

You know the line from that movie, or song… Put me in coach, I'm ready to play.

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A cartoon zombie mascot reaches out in vain to stop a row of large dominoes marked with warning symbols from toppling over, surrounded by scattered blueprints and a broken magnifying glass in a cluttered workshop.
November 4, 2020

5 Mistakes Marketers Make

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5 Mistakes Marketers Make

You're making mistakes in your marketing and don't even know it. BTW, I make mistakes too. Here are a few of them that are killing you.

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November 3, 2020

Special Ad Categories: Why You SHOULD Be Using Them

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Special Ad Categories: Why You SHOULD Be Using Them

Some version of this question has been asked of the Ad Zombies team a LOT lately: can you write me an ad for X type of business that Facebook will accept?

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands at a podium desk writing in a giant open ledger with a quill, surrounded by tall stacks of notebooks and folders, with an upward-trending growth chart drawn on the wall behind it.
October 30, 2020

Practical Growth Advice ANY Business Can Use

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Practical Growth Advice ANY Business Can Use

I cannot stress this enough. You should be documenting EVERYTHING in your business, not just SOPs or internal how-to's.

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October 20, 2020

Succession

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Succession

I've been thinking a lot lately about transition and succession in my business.

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits on the ground looking distraught, surrounded by spilled ink, torn paper scraps, and a fallen megaphone amid scattered confetti.
October 9, 2020

I F**d Up!

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I F**d Up!

Yes, the title says it all. But the truth is I REALLY f**d up!

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A cartoon zombie mascot kicks aside torn sale banners and a tipped-over shopping cart in front of a sagging storefront awning with flickering string lights, surrounded by scattered calendar pages.
October 1, 2020

Black Friday Sales? That's So 2019

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Black Friday Sales? That's So 2019

If the rest of the year hasn't tipped you off yet, last year's holiday sales strategies probably aren't suitable for a "rinse and repeat" application this year. Black Friday sales are so 2019.

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September 18, 2020

Get Off The Roller Coaster

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Get Off The Roller Coaster

Sitting in the therapist's office I could hear her words, but the thoughts I had didn't align with what she said, "Get off the roller coaster."

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June 12, 2020

Guts Over Gurus

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Guts Over Gurus

Trust your gut, not your guru.

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An illustrated zombie character leans wearily against a crumbling, vine-covered doorway, holding a wilting potted plant and a messy stack of papers spilling from an open ledger, under a stormy, leaf-swept sky.
May 29, 2020

Help, My Business Is Dying!

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Help, My Business Is Dying!

At Death's Door

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May 27, 2020

Life In The Fast Lane

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Life In The Fast Lane

I've started enough businesses now that I've noticed a pattern emerging. My businesses follow my pace. This means, if I want my business to be moving quickly I have to be at my best. Not stuck in t...

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April 27, 2020

Protect The Door To Your Mind

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Protect The Door To Your Mind

We are living in, and through, some incredibly challenging times. Today there's fear and uncertainty unlike any other time in history. Think about this: when 9-11 happened, social media wasn't arou...

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March 23, 2020

Mindset & Opportunities

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Mindset & Opportunities

The world may feel like it's in a tailspin, but every good pilot knows that when the plane feels out of control it's time to focus on solutions, not dwell on the problem.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands triumphantly on a pile of giant exclamation-point sculptures, holding one aloft overhead as more tumble down around it.
March 19, 2020

OMG! WTF! Why All The !!!!!! Points?

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OMG! WTF! Why All The !!!!!! Points?

I know what you're thinking…OMFG! Finally, a post that has NOTHING to do with the global pandemic? Au contraire my friends, this pandemic started years ago, no, decades back, and has reached GLOBAL...

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits cross-legged on a stack of cardboard boxes indoors, smiling while watering a small sunflower on a sunlit windowsill, with a steaming mug and a neat stack of toilet paper rolls nearby.
March 13, 2020

Positivity In The Time Of Coronavirus

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Positivity In The Time Of Coronavirus

Can you really look on the bright side of a global pandemic with a side of economic panic? I think you can...and you should.

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March 6, 2020

Coronavirus, Cruises & Creative: Our #SMMW20 Wrap-Up

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Coronavirus, Cruises & Creative: Our #SMMW20 Wrap-Up

Ken is back from speaking at #SMMW20 (that's Social Media Marketing World 2020) and I've got questions for him. Our accidentally pun-filled chat was punctuated with plenty of side commentary about ...

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A zombie mascot sits pensively on the hood of a car in a foggy driveway at dawn, holding a wilted flower and gazing into the soft morning light.
February 29, 2020

Luke's Last Day On Earth

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Luke's Last Day On Earth

Luke had no idea that was his last drive to school. Life is precious, short, and full of unknowns.

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A cartoon zombie mascot slumps in an armchair, surrounded by a toppling stack of unread magazines with a torn envelope and crumpled redemption slip on the floor nearby.
February 26, 2020

I Regret The Free Magazines

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I Regret The Free Magazines

Recently I got a letter in the mail. I had airline miles that were going to expire…on an airline I had NO reason to fly on anytime soon. (Thanks old work trips!) But there was good news: I could us...

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands contentedly at a diner counter, with several translucent duplicate versions of itself in different poses fanning out behind it, surrounded by cozy string lights and a blank menu board.
February 21, 2020

Don't Be So One Dimensional

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Don't Be So One Dimensional

When I waltz in through the front door of Aloha Kitchen, a go to place near my office, I like that they know my order. NO…I love it!

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February 14, 2020

Bye Now! The Button That Kills Your Business

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Bye Now! The Button That Kills Your Business

Yup, I started this article with every marketers FAVORITE button, Bye Now. No, it's not a typo, here's why.

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A cartoon zombie mascot holds a large old-fashioned ear trumpet toward a client across a messy desk, straining to listen amid scattered coffee cups and crumpled paper.
February 10, 2020

Clients Tell You What They Need: Are You Listening?

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Clients Tell You What They Need: Are You Listening?

"I Feel Your Pain…"

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A zombie mascot sits on a couch in a dim room, wiping away tears while watching a large glowing advertisement projected on the wall, with a bowl of popcorn spilled beside its feet.
January 29, 2020

Google Just Made The Ad Of The Decade

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Google Just Made The Ad Of The Decade

This year, there have been dramatic, last-minute changes to Super Bowl advertising. One notable example of an ad that was pulled is the Planters ad where Mr. Peanut dies. Because, obviously, no one...

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A zombie mascot kneels in a graveyard, laying a wilted flower on a broken peanut-shaped tombstone next to a fallen top hat and monocle.
January 22, 2020

A Fatal Nut Allergy Kills A Brand

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A Fatal Nut Allergy Kills A Brand

Planters, perhaps the most well known nut company in America, maybe the world, is 100% NUTS! No, I am not talking about the snack that millions eat daily, I am referring to their crazy idea of chan...

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A zombie mascot balances precariously on a tall, crumbling pedestal under a spotlight, holding a large gilded mirror shaped like its own face.
January 14, 2020

The Danger Of Building A Personal Brand

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The Danger Of Building A Personal Brand

Over the past few years my business has grown and so has this thing called my personal brand. Today I am being asked to coach and mentor business owners around the world, speak on larger stages, an...

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A cartoon zombie strains under the crushing weight of a giant see-through boulder while balancing on a wobbly pedestal surrounded by empty picture frames scattered on the floor.
January 8, 2020

The Weight of Perceived Expectations

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The Weight of Perceived Expectations

Expectations carry weight. Perceived expectations surmount to a weight that is unquantifiable and therefore, burdensome and undoubtedly heavy. What happens when you fall victim to perceived vs actu...

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December 13, 2019

Operation Disneyland: How Disney Helped Me Grow and Scale

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Operation Disneyland: How Disney Helped Me Grow and Scale

When you wish upon a star... NOTHING HAPPENS!

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December 2, 2019

What Jeff Bezos Taught Me In 15 Minutes

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What Jeff Bezos Taught Me In 15 Minutes

When a guy like Jeff Bezos gives you a peek into his business operations, his mindset, you should really pay attention. I spend my time paying attention to people WAY smarter than me, and it wasn't...

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie mascot leaning over a checkout counter, arms full of cash trying to hand it over, surrounded by scattered papers and a fallen rope barrier, with no one there to accept the payment.
November 25, 2019

Take My Money, Please... They Kept Saying NO!

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Take My Money, Please... They Kept Saying NO!

That's right, I wanted to GIVE more money to a company and was repeatedly told NO, you can't, that's not possible. Wait, what?! I know, confusing, right?

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A zombie mascot stands in a crowded stadium at dusk, hand over its heart and the other arm raised in gratitude to the cheering crowd, with confetti falling and a pennant and cider cup beside it on the bleacher.
November 22, 2019

Lead With Gratitude

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Lead With Gratitude

You could feel the chill of the fall air, yet no one was cold. The stands were filled to capacity and the crowd…it was the final regular season game and the crowd was electric.

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November 18, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 9: A Successful Entrepreneur

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 9: A Successful Entrepreneur

There's one quality that I believe determines whether someone will be successful, or whether they'll fail in whatever endeavor it is they're pursuing. It's tenacity. I have a relentless tenacity th...

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November 12, 2019

An Open Letter To Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook

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An Open Letter To Mark Zuckerberg and Facebook

Dear Mr. Zuckerberg,

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A zombie mascot sits nervously in a vintage airplane cockpit, gripping the steering yoke and surrounded by dials and switches, with a flight manual lying open and unread on the seat next to it.
November 11, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 8: The Unintentional Pilot

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 8: The Unintentional Pilot

I started this book with a question: Have you ever flown an airplane? About that question...

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A cartoon zombie mascot kneels among crumpled papers and toppled crates in a lamp-lit study, holding a hand to its chest while reading an open hardcover book.
November 4, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 7: Mistakes

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 7: Mistakes

As you grow your business, you'll make mistakes. Forgive yourself. Then, read and re-read this chapter to avoid making more!

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A cartoon zombie mascot throws a sharp jab at a swinging heavy bag in a bare-bones boxing gym, chalk dust scattering from the impact.
October 28, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 6: All About that Jab

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 6: All About that Jab

It would be impossible for me to say too much about jabbing. So, let's do a whole chapter on it, shall we?

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October 21, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 5: Setbacks

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 5: Setbacks

Don't expect miracles when you start your business. There are going to be early setbacks. In fact, there are going to be setbacks throughout your business life, and I'm not talking about setbacks o...

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An illustrated zombie mascot strains under the weight of a giant rusted ball-and-chain covered in old locks, standing in a dim attic surrounded by crumpled, scribbled-on papers.
October 18, 2019

This Secret Has Weighed Me Down For 34 Years

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This Secret Has Weighed Me Down For 34 Years

That's right. For 34 years, I've had a secret. Something I kept hidden from the world, from my family, even my wife.

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A zombie mascot throws a boxing jab at a hanging heavy bag in a gritty gym, with an old pair of oversized boxing gloves hanging on the wall nearby a cluttered board of taped-up photos.
October 14, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 4: Mentorship

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 4: Mentorship

I've already talked a lot about what a big difference Gary Vaynerchuk has made in my life and my business, but I wanted to devote a whole chapter to mentorship because it's just that important.

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October 7, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 3: Scaling

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 3: Scaling

Yes, our CEO decided to give away his best-selling book for free. Crazy, right? You can also listen in to the audiobook by subscribing to the EntreGrow podcast!

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A cartoon zombie mascot throws a forward punch toward the camera, mid-stride, while a pile of notebooks and instructional books tips over behind it, symbolizing action over endless preparation.
September 30, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 2: Don't Prepare, Just Do

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 2: Don't Prepare, Just Do

People spend a lot of time preparing to do something, telling themselves "I'm getting ready." Preparing to write a book, preparing to start a new hobby. They spend a lot of time getting ready to ge...

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A cartoon zombie mascot bursts joyfully through a pile of old cardboard boxes in a sunlit garage, one fist raised in triumph and the other holding a rolled-up blueprint, with torn paper scraps flying around it.
September 23, 2019

Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 1: 50 is the New 25

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Jab Till It Hurts - Chapter 1: 50 is the New 25

I don't think there's a right time or a wrong time to start a new business. There's just the time. Right now. Today. The opportunity to do something that you've always dreamed about doing is here. ...

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September 20, 2019

Why I Decided To Give Away My Best Stuff For Free

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Why I Decided To Give Away My Best Stuff For Free

If you haven't figured it out by now, I really pay attention to what my mentors do. One of them, Gary Vaynerchuk, regularly reiterates "watch what I do". And I do.

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A cartoon zombie mascot looks exasperated while navigating a maze of velvet-rope stanchions, holding a large hemp leaf and surrounded by scattered CBD oil bottles, crumpled papers, and oversized 'rejected' rubber stamps.
September 10, 2019

Reefer Madness...Or, Everything We Currently Know About Advertising CBD Products on Facebook

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Reefer Madness...Or, Everything We Currently Know About Advertising CBD Products on Facebook

Update: September 17, 2019

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A zombie stands in a field, arms raised in delight, watching a flock of giant flying cheeseburgers soar overhead while a pile of discarded, blank flyers lies forgotten at its feet.
September 6, 2019

How Flying Cheeseburgers Inspire Me

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How Flying Cheeseburgers Inspire Me

How many ads do you see in a single day? Would you believe 300? No? OK, 900? Well, what about 1,500 ads per day?

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August 5, 2019

How To Crush It With A Single Video

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How To Crush It With A Single Video

So this morning, I was on my weekly mastermind call from different parts of the world. We get together and we coach -- we push one another, we challenge each other, and we constantly question our b...

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A smug zombie relaxes in a recliner with his feet on an unopened hospital bag, arms crossed, in front of a calendar marked with large X's, while a watering can quietly spills water toward his feet in the background.
July 29, 2019

How I Knew My Wife WOULDN'T Go Into Labor

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How I Knew My Wife WOULDN'T Go Into Labor

The Delusion of Low Expectations

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A cartoon zombie mascot dressed like a hair stylist thoughtfully trims a mannequin head's hair with comb and shears, standing over a floor swept with hair clippings arranged in a spiral pattern.
July 25, 2019

What Hair Stylists Taught Me About Creative Strategy

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What Hair Stylists Taught Me About Creative Strategy

From Great Creative Strategy Springs Great Haircuts

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A zombie mascot stands victoriously atop a stack of crates and ledgers in a cluttered office, holding up a golden thumbs-up-shaped 'For Sale' sign under a dramatic spotlight.
July 17, 2019

Why I'm Selling My Company To Facebook... Someday

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Why I'm Selling My Company To Facebook... Someday

Building a business to the point of acquisition is incredible. It takes hard work, dedication, and tenacity to build the team and the infrastructure necessary to grow a business to the point of bei...

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A cartoon zombie mascot sits nervously at a nicely set dinner table, gesturing with one hand as if practicing what to say, with an empty chair waiting across from them.
July 13, 2019

About My Dinner with Gary Vaynerchuk...

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About My Dinner with Gary Vaynerchuk...

When you're invited to dinner with Gary Vaynerchuk do you start rehearsing the things you're going to say? Do you worry about what to wear? Do you think to yourself, what if he thinks my business i...

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Illustration of a zombie calmly drinking coffee on a porch at dawn, unaware of a chaotic mess of scattered papers and toppled poster boards visible through the open door behind him.
May 31, 2019

It Could Always Be Worse

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It Could Always Be Worse

I was out front sipping my coffee as the sun rose over Gilbert, Arizona, the city I've called home for 25 years. Oblivious to the chaos going on inside my house, I was busy taking early morning pic...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot animatedly speaking into a vintage microphone, gesturing as if telling a story, with notes and papers scattered on a nearby table.
May 29, 2019

How To Write Facebook Ads That Sell

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How To Write Facebook Ads That Sell

I love doing podcast interviews. They are some of the best days for me in the office. My energy is always high, my brain engaged, and I get to employ my superpower: Storytelling.

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands in a sunlit workshop, arm raised toward a wall of pinned sketches and photos, holding a notebook to its chest beside a glowing lantern, open books, a compass on letters, and a plant reaching toward the window light.
May 15, 2019

Inspired

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Inspired

Has anyone inspired you?

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A zombie mascot strides confidently toward a stage decorated with giant dollar-sign props and confetti, raising one fist in triumph beside a large oversized novelty check.
May 1, 2019

Get To $1 Million In Sales This Year

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Get To $1 Million In Sales This Year

As I was about to take the stage in Las Vegas this past Saturday, something remarkable hit me and I thought I would take a moment to share with YOU what I shared with that audience...

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Illustration of a zombie character standing alone in an empty office at dusk, holding a fire extinguisher in one hand and a smoking stack of papers in the other, surrounded by rows of vacant desks.
April 24, 2019

Are You A CEO Or A Firefighter?

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Are You A CEO Or A Firefighter?

The office is empty, your team has left for the day, and there you are… alone.

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A cartoon zombie mascot stands at a podium holding up five fingers in warning, surrounded by broken picture frames and crossed-out poster boards symbolizing advertising mistakes to avoid.
April 3, 2019

5 Things You Should NEVER Do In Your Facebook and Instagram Ads

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5 Things You Should NEVER Do In Your Facebook and Instagram Ads

Normally, I'd tell you that "every Ad's different" or "that might work for your audience, so go for it!" Normally, when it comes to advertising and creative marketing, I'm far more open minded… and...

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie mascot standing on a pile of books and crates, holding out a compass and pointing toward a winding path leading to a distant hill on the horizon.
March 29, 2019

How To Grow Your Business By 33% This Year

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How To Grow Your Business By 33% This Year

Part I: Here's Your GPS For Getting Results

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Illustration of a cartoon zombie standing on tiptoes on a tall stack of books, reaching one arm up toward a sunrise on the horizon.
March 21, 2019

Just The Tip

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Just The Tip

Hey, if you missed my other blog post about headlines, you won't appreciate the headline of this blog post, if you did, awesome.

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An illustrated zombie mascot proudly presents an enormous, dripping stacked burger on a rustic food-cart counter, arms spread wide in showman-like celebration with pennant flags fluttering behind.
March 14, 2019

OMG! This Is The World's Best Burger!

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OMG! This Is The World's Best Burger!

The world's BEST burger? Really? I know what you're thinking...

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Illustration of a zombie mascot standing among stacked ledger books and wilted flowers, holding a contract in one hand and a wedding ring in the other as if comparing their weight.
March 6, 2019

The Business... Of Marriage

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The Business... Of Marriage

I Do. It Means More Than You Think.

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Illustration of a zombie kneeling in a park, placing wilted flowers beside a small paw-print memorial stone while holding an empty dog leash and collar, with scattered torn advertising flyers blowing across the ground.
February 28, 2019

Fido's Dead 🐶😢

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Fido's Dead 🐶😢

What All Advertising Gets Wrong

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A zombie mascot grins mischievously while writing enthusiastically on a large scroll with an oversized quill, surrounded by crumpled paper balls on the floor.
February 21, 2019

Confessions Of A Master Clickbaiter

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Confessions Of A Master Clickbaiter

Wait, did you read that headline the right way? Yes, I wrote it to get you to click on it, but the content of this post is definitely not clickbait, although I am a master at that.

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An illustrated zombie mascot stands at an ice cream counter lined with many different colorful ice cream cones and scoops, reaching eagerly for another flavor from a display case full of varied ice cream tubs.
February 14, 2019

31 Flavors Are Better Than 1

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31 Flavors Are Better Than 1

The other day I walked into an ice cream shop. I was excited to try a few different flavors: new stuff, stuff that I'd never tried before. One of the joys of walking into an ice cream shop is that ...

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An illustrated zombie character stands triumphantly on a stack of books with arms raised in a victorious power pose, surrounded by scraps of torn paper fluttering in the air like confetti.
February 7, 2019

3 INSANE Things Tony Robbins Taught Me

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3 INSANE Things Tony Robbins Taught Me

Truth: 3 Doesn't EVEN Scratch The Surface.

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A zombie mascot delivers a somber speech from a podium on a windswept stage, with scattered papers and a row of empty billboard frames standing under a stormy sky.
January 17, 2019

State of the State of Advertising 2019

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State of the State of Advertising 2019

My fellow advertisers... Today, the state of advertising is on the decline. Dark, bumpy days lie ahead of us.

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Illustration of a lone zombie mascot standing on a barricaded wall, bracing against crates and planks while looking out at a distant horde approaching under a dusky sky, with papers blowing in the wind.
February 19, 2018

ATTACK!

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ATTACK!

A horde of zombies is headed your way. You're completely outnumbered. You have 3 options:

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A bored-looking zombie mascot leans back with arms crossed, surrounded by a pile of discarded megaphones and oversized blank sale banners it is pointedly ignoring.
February 14, 2018

BUY NOW! Did We Get Your Attention? Of Course NOT.

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BUY NOW! Did We Get Your Attention? Of Course NOT.

Before you write and run a "LIMITED TIME OFFER! 50% OFF! BUY NOW!" Ad, think to yourself, "Would I purchase this if it were a product I was interested in while scrolling through my social page?"

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A cartoon zombie mascot kneels tenderly holding a large paper heart to its chest, surrounded by rose petals, with crumpled generic discount flyers tossed aside nearby.
February 13, 2018

Sell LOVE, not Valentine's Day

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Sell LOVE, not Valentine's Day

It's no secret; great copywriting is now reserved for novels, TV Shows, and Movies. Ads get put on the backburner and relegated to things like "Take Advantage of Our 40% OFF Valentine's Day Special...

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